Today, It snapped.
Although I was aware of the frailty and brevity of Its "life," I was still taken aback. Of all places, of all times, of all moments, It chose to snap when I wasn't looking, when I was unaware.
It snapped days after it sinked in me that I wasn't getting any nearer, that I wasn't getting anywhere. This would have been a perfect time, as if God, or someone else who controls the littlest details in this universe, cued for his Angels, or whomever, to cut It to make me realize how fruitless that path was, and I'd have to switch gears soon.
Though I would love to continue Its advocacy, I realize the attachments I gave to It shackled me in a way that made it hard for me to let go. With It around my wrist, I was constantly reminded of all the things I could not achieve, I could not have, and all the things I gave more priority to. It reminded me of weaknesses I could not strengthen, vices I could not avoid, flaws I could not straighten out, desires I could not simply ignore, and memories I could not forget.
Sadly, it reminded me of my personal commitment, obviously one-sided, to all things connected to that past.
Now my wrist is left bare--without that familiar band encircling me, keeping all my emotions in check. It has left a white discoloration on my relatively darker complexion--a constant reminder that It may have snapped and that I had to move on but there's nothing wrong with missing Its presence for in Its existence I experienced a different joy in my heart that never fails to put a smile on my face once remembered, a feeling that I chose, sadly, never to feel again.
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